Abominable Advent Calendar Day 7: Snowbeast (1977)
Crapsterpiece Category: Made for TV Trash
Heads up: blood, offscreen dismemberment, fun fur
What happens when you take Jaws, reduce the budget to almost nothing, replace the shark with a wampa, and move the setting to a ski resort? You get Snowbeast, which is kind of like the much bloodier, marginally sexier, grown-up version of Scooby Doo: That’s Snow Ghost. Carrie Rill (Sylvia Sydney, poor dear) and her son Tony (Robert Logan) are hosting a winter carnival at their resort when a woman is murdered on the slopes. Sheriff Paraday (sexy Clint Walker), suspects an animal attack, and he tries to solve the mystery with the help of Tony, Tony’s ex Ellen Seberg (Yvette Mimieux), and her husband Gar (Bo Svenson).
There are more murders, and the beast menaces the winter carnival, which, true to the “mayor of the small village that depends on tourism” trope, Mrs. Rill has refused to cancel. There’s a stampede at the beauty pageant, and we see her splayed on the floor howling, “The crown!” over the crushed tiara. This is grade A trash cinema.
Tony, Gar, Ellen, and the Sheriff go off to find the beast on their own, leading to a couple of mildly scary run-ins where we finally see the titular snowbeast in all its polyester fun-fur glory. Gar’s quest for a comeback and the love triangle will leave you saying, “Yvette, dump him for the guy who’s going to inherit the resort so we can get back to the monster carnage!” And after all the skier-chomping , the ending is a bit of a letdown in my opinion—you’d expect better from a monster that was capable of such violent mutilations—but Snowbeast is still a great time, particularly if you’re eviscerating it with a few smart-mouthed friends.
